where do i start? today i actually went out ate outside of the house. it was great. jesse and david came to pick me up and then we went to rite aide. we got candy and such and then took denise out to jack in the box and then david and jesse got free ice cream. then we left and went to salzers. there we get free stuff. like always. i got a gob poster, divit, saraha hot nights poster. cool. i got three cds. the starting line, the stryder, the vandals (too bad its an advanced copy and is not enhanced), and glasseater. i spent over $35. i needed new cds and this is very refreshing. anyways then we went to barnes. the new one. i was very suprised. well lit big nice looking. i have to go to borders to order my book. apparently its already out but i know for a fact that it is not out yet! im just in the know. anyways after that we went to in and out in ventura. it is always packed with cute boys and that makes me happy. really happy. i saw smiling and the best part my hair was nice. i was happy. then we picked up stephanie. i had a really fun night. really it was first time i left the house since everyone left for school. book book book!

yo

favorite commercial: boost mobile phones with the old people getting all freaky so great

i baby sat today. it was probably the easiest day to date. when i got there one was sleeping, then the the other fell asleep and then the next. i had pretty much an hour to do nothing but explore. i watched tv. and for about the fourth time i watched dinosaur. yes the movie from disney that nobody remembers. there is like 4 days till the book comes out. im so excitied b/c one i have money and two i can buy it the day it comes out. ah i saw some of the book today and it looks awesome lots of food for everyone to make its some of the foods are so simple everyone can make it ah its great. i really want a pizza like right now. i dont know why but im so hungry. ive been wanting to eat something all day today but i had nothing. looking forward to tuesday.

i wake up and my moom tells me to get dressed b/c we are going on base so im like ok. there my mom pasys me the money she owes me. i also got a new bra. anyways when i have money i dont want to spend it on anything b/c then i wont have any money. and when i dont hav money i want to spend it. i ahvent bought anything really big since my babysitting job. funny b/c when i dont have money i sit and dream of all the possiblities all the things i could buy but now that i have some money i dont buy anything. its actually quite scarry. i thinking about getting some shoes, tickets, some dvds, cds and some clothes.my first big buy is going to be the book. i am so getting the book. this will be the first time in my life that i have $100. by the end of the week i will be in the triple digits. then by the end of the week i will be back to double. oh well. i saw a best of tony hawk tour and it sucks that i cant go to the boom boom huck jam. i really wish i could. i need a car then maybe i can.
its so cold in oxnard. im watching the tonight show and hes says stuff like oh its hot 102. im like in oxnard its foggy cold and cloudy. we are a void for heat. never hot in oxnard.

i actually went somewhere. my sister had this thing with the doctor. it was in ventura. we kinda got lost but i found it. thats right, im a navational half assed rock star. go me. then we went to the mall. i havent been there in a while then i remembered why, the mall annoys me. i saw so many people that went to school. lke joe, sam, nick, some other people that i cant remember the names of. but i saw the shoes that i want and the shirt. but that takes some money and that i dont have... not entirely true but yeah, not a big spender. but when i get more money then i will be a big spender. being in the mall also makes me think about the days when i will never have to pay for clothes again. my plan is to work of a cool clothing company get free clothes and never buy another tshirt again. the plan can change but that is the plan for the time being and it is fun thinking about it. anyways. i have my idea for a tatoo. its a heart on my wrist. just a heart. or maybe a star not sure. and im gonna start stretching my ears out. im using toothpicks i know i know but it works. im looking all over the place for some but cannot find them so im starting slow. still looking. the tony hawk tour thingy ended and i am sad. it was so fun that it had to end.

nothing like normal. i watched the tony hawk thing on tv. it made me feel all warm and squishy. they were having genuine fun. then it gave me the money idea for a movie. ah anyways. ive started to make a t shirt out of an extra large shirt. it looks like it is coming strong. i guess. im hoping it will take a good 2 days of work and then i will have a cool shirt that i fixed to wear. ill be so proud. then ill be a lot more confident to fix a lot more shirts. then my next big buy is a book entitled x-treme cuisine by robert earl. its so great it comes out october 1 so im excited. b/c you can make cool stuff like a bird bagel im going either to borders or barnes and nobel. oh yeah yesterday at the navy exchange i saw probably one of the greatest cooking sets to date. it was the jamie oliver set. it is bowls, plates, baking plates, cups and stuff.aww so great. i was standing there for like a good 10 minutes just to look at everything. it was great and i want to get them. ALL! im gonna be a lean mean cooking machine therefore more parties for me. haha.

i want fun and i want to be wasted, sort of not really but i do want fun. that and i just saw the making of the andrew w k video for jackass. ah so fun. i wish i was there getting beat up. its better than staying home. anyways i guess you could say that the faucet breaking was a sign b/c when we were about to leave for church, the car wouldnt start. so my dad drove us to church. then we went to the store like always i got a cute roxy skirt for $4.99! its pink and great. so cute.
for the first time, ive never felt so alone. not a call or a message on the machine to make me run. everyone has school or work that they dont have time to do anything on random wednesdays. for the first time, i truely feel alone. there were times when i felt like i was by myself but i knew that people were always there to make me laugh. all i have now is my family. dont get me wrong. i love my family and they make me laugh but there are days when you want to go out and be with people who make you feel like hey im not so weird after all . as i sat and watched all my friends leave one by one was like i still have some people. the day i realized that everyone was gone when my parents were talking about charisse and linda and how they visited they were like you should have asked them to leave earlier blah blah b/c you were late for the babysitter. and im like it was my last day to see them and then it hit me. it was my last day to see them. i was sitting at the dinner table thinking that yeah it was the last time. things change.
you never come home to the same home.

it was a big day i baby sat washed the car and woke up late. it was a productive day. you can say. if your reading this and wondering "what? waking up late? you have nothing to wake up late for?" yeah its a weird thing my mom gets pissd if i wake up past 12pm. yeah i was up at 9 b/c someone ddecided to mow the lawn and use a air blower to clear the cement. what ever happend to the broom? anyways, while i was babysitting, their cat,oreo was scratcing at the door. so i let the cat in and attempt to pet her. but the cat was scared of me and ran away. so i go back to watching tv. then like i see in the reflection of the glass a cat standing and smelling my hair! i turn around and the cat runs away. i go after her and then caller her name and starts to rub her head on my hand. i guess thats hoe she says hello. thats probably one of the weirdest experiences ive had with a cat. i should be the one girl babysitters club. seriously. like if youve read the book or seen the show they probably make bank babysitting all those kids. well i can handle three at one time. thats a start. but yeah i would have so much money for college.